I am a road trip kind of girl. I really do love to travel, just about anywhere. In fact, I am more up for the great adventure it provides. So, to say the least, when the opportunity presented itself to jump in the car and drive with my parents and grandfather to Monument, Colorado from Acworth, Georgia, I thought……ummm yeah!

Well if adventure is what I was looking for, I guess you could say I found it. I survived the first four hours in the car by holding on to the “oh shit” handle (if you don’t know what that is, ask someone) and praying to God that my grandfather didn’t hit a passing car while my father was shouting on the phone because that is the only way he can hear. Getting through the twist and turns of I-24 through what should have been the beautiful Tennessee Mountains was a dream come true. When my father’s call finally dropped, he and my grandfather passed the time by talking in a volume that could only indicate they wanted to include the driver of the tractor trailer next to us, (the VA hospital really needs to upgrade the hearing aids they are handing out to the men and women who have sacrificed so much, thank you grandpa and daddy). My mom and I tried to entertain ourselves in the back seat by watching movie trailers and me introducing her to the latest hits on the radio. In the back of both our minds was, “when will it finally be lunch so we can escape the rolling death trap and put a well-respected driver in the front seat”, aka me.

Scariest Ride

Well let me tell you something about lunch when you are on a road trip, time change is a bitch, and lunch never seems to get here! When it is supposed to be 11am in Georgia it is only 10am in Kentucky, that’s right Kentucky, because my grandpa can run with the best of them on Andretti Speedway, (which must be a family trait) and made Tennessee wish we had at least seen her Rocky tops. That extra hour waiting to figure out what city we would grace our presence with and trying to capture a picture of horses for my sister was the longest hour of my life. By the way, Brittany, they don’t keep all the horses in Kentucky by the highway apparently, so we didn’t get a good shot.

After we refueled our bellies and tank in Paducah, Kentucky, which is a very resourceful town in case we ever decided to repeat this adventure, we headed off to St. Louis. Mom and I got our wish and made it to the front seats. I would like to take a moment to thank Samsung, Comcast and Verizon Wireless for providing entertainment to the two grown men in the back seat. Apparently you can pull up Xfinity for distracting small children and men who you just need out of your hair for a while. Its Saturday football and we are a SEC family, even if we can’t all agree on one team, so they enjoyed listening to the phone at the highest volume possible.

We finally reach St. Louis and after having a full car debate on whether or not we can trust Waze, we make it to a parking deck near the arch. When I say near the arch, I don’t mean the one they strategically placed next to it, but let’s just say we compromised for equal walking distance between the arch and the casino. Mom and I decided to head off in the rain for the one tourist attraction I insisted we stop for and the guys left us in favor of fortune.

Gateway to the West

If you have never been to the Gateway to the West, add it to your bucket list. Not only is it statement to the miracles of the engineering mind, but I am pretty sure it is where they got the idea for Star Trek. After purchasing our tickets to the top, we waited in line at our “transportation station.” When the doors opened we stepped into, what can only be described as, an escape pod. It is a tiny white room with five white seats; I am almost positive it has made an appearance in at least one sci-fi movie. We reached the top in four minutes and exited into the walk way.

Arch Space Pod

From the top you really have a great view of downtown St. Louis and after taking a million pictures to find the right selfie without being photo bombed we got back in our escape pod and rode the three minutes down. Why they insist on making it take four minutes to go up and only three minutes to go down, I don’t know. For those of you with an engineering mind set don’t tell me, I would like it to remain one of life’s mysteries.

Selfie

By the time we decided there was nothing in the gift shop we had to have, the guys had given up on fortune and met us outside the arch. This of course resulted in my father trying to explain how we get back to where we parked, like mom and I were a bunch of lost children. Dad, if you read this, I am not sure we would have been able to back track our steps from just 30 minutes ago without you. Of course the debate with Waze continued as we tried to find our way back to the highway and we have set our sights on Kansas City, Kansas.

If you are going to go on a road trip, you need to find at least one diner to stop at. To be frank, I am not sure how they made it in the dark ages without technology, because they don’t put diners on the edges of major highways any more. The great reviews on Trip Advisor lead us to The 63 Diner in Columbia, Missouri. This place is amazing, it’s a good bit off the highway and my grandpa seemed convince that we were headed to North Dakota. Once we reached the diner, the 10 minute extra drive was well worth it. The diner is a throwback to the 50’s, with waitresses in poodle skirts and movie stars decorating the walls.

The 63 Diner

In continuing the journey, and apparently the overall theme for the trip, we had a new debate on where to stop for the night. After randomly picking an exit, we decided to drive by all three hotels and managed to pick the one where we ended up having to switch rooms do to a bug I wasn’t willing to share the bed with.

The next day went by in a breeze considering most of the drive is through Kansas. The guys started off in the morning and to say we didn’t even make it to lunch before the women were back in the front seats. If the free land in Kansas couldn’t convince you to move out to the heartland then surely the straight line winds that made dogging 18-wheelers one of the most exciting portions of the drive could. How the guys could sleep in the back while we were basically playing chicken with other drivers, I don’t know. They woke up in time for lunch in Hays, Kansas were my grandfather decided Golden Corral was to be our destination. I’m not sure if it was the lack of sleep or the crazy drive, but I couldn’t stop staring when I saw a monk in the Golden Corral in Hays Kansas. Really? Yes, I confirmed with my mom that I wasn’t hallucinating and then all I could think of was, do they wear anything else under the robe.

The rest of the drive until Colorado was much of the same. I was tempted to stop at the welcome to Colorado sign and hug it, but the wind and the promise of finally making it to my aunt and uncle’s house in Monument was enough of a deterrent to keep my foot firmly on the gas pedal. We made one *final stop at the welcome center, where we decided to collect a billion brochures that I am sure will end up at the bottom of someone’s suitcase. With only an hour and a half to go, we turned off onto 85 my dream came true and it started to snow. That dream shortly turned in to a nightmare when we ended up behind a truck that was convinced going 10 miles an hour was the best course of action to enhance our scenic route.

SNOW!!!

Finally after two full days in the car, driving through seven different states and driving for 1,380 miles we made it to Monument, Colorado and although I am happy to be flying home with my husband in a few days, instead of having a repeat performance of our adventure in reverse, I wouldn’t have traded the trip for anything. Spending time with the people you love on an adventure with a vague plan is about as close to perfect as you can get.

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